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Worry Cure Book

Posted: Mon Jan 11, 2010 3:19 am
by Polar Bear
A couple of days ago in another thread ViewsAskew (I think ??) mentioned a book called The Worry Cure. I never read books like this but it sounded so like me that I ordered it from Amazon and it arrived in 2 days.

Haven't had time to get into it properly, but have managed to read about 40 pages. This book is very interesting. It explains things so clearly. So far what I am understanding is that us worriers cannot cope well with uncertainty, and we do not cope well with negative emotions. Therefore we worrry and worry, looking for the perfect solutions to make things always good for ourselves and for everyone. We (worriers) are all generally of the nature of feeling responsible for everyone's happiness.

It is likely that I am not explaining it too clearly as I have just wakened up and am on my nightly walkabout. But certainly at present, I would recommend this as enlightening reading.

Bought it as 'used good condition' on Amazon for less than $4 for paperback, cos paperback is easier to read in bed, and the condition is excellent.

Posted: Mon Jan 11, 2010 3:29 am
by Polar Bear
Should have stated that book says we cannot tell ourselves 'dont worry'. cos this won't work. Cos we feel we have to worry in order to cover all possible options, so that we can be prepared for 'whatever eventuality' is to happen.

I think bottom line will be that the reader understands that it is ok to feel negative emotions and if something does not have a perfect outcome, then that is the time to deal with it. i.e. and not with the 25 or 26 other scenarios that we have worried ourselves sick about and that never happened.

I think it will be helping us deal with emotions and uncertainties.

So far, I am impressed with the book.

Posted: Mon Jan 11, 2010 5:34 am
by ViewsAskew
I am happy to hear that, PB. I know my best friend LOVES it. Her therapist recommended it.

I must get it....soon.

Posted: Thu Jan 21, 2010 4:53 am
by Polar Bear
The book is definitely worth a read. I told my friend that I would recommend it for her daughter (daughter would be very much like my nature/personality). So my friend ordered it, gave it to daughter, and I've had a phone call from her daughter to say..... 'Woww...this book is fabulous... I think I understand myself a little better.... I am not just a neurotic...I am not going crazy' This girl holds a responsible position as a well respected Head of Department in senior school and comes across as super efficient, but underneath is writhing with insecurities and self doubts.

I actually had started to refer to myself self deprecatingly as being a little bit neurotic.... kind of get in there and say it before someone else does. I actually found an old Thank You Card from my daughter=in-law in which she had written - thank you, you take the strain and stresses for all of us.

But I don't this others realise this effiency is actually the result of a worrisome nature, and comes at a pretty high emotional cost.

I am only half way through the book and feeling more relaxed at having learned it is ok to feel cross/put upon/ negative, and that you don't have to be Ms 120 per cent. and more importantly have learned why some of us feel the need to be Ms 120 per cent, w - hat's the chance by the end of it I'll be chilled out and able to face anything without concern. I doubt it, but I certainly will have more understanding of my behaviour.

Posted: Thu Jan 21, 2010 5:46 am
by ViewsAskew
I am so happy I mentioned this book. My best friend (also an Ennegram Seven, like me and Susan) will be thrilled that her mentioning it to me made a difference for someone, too.

Now, I WILL go order it. I WILL!!!!