My Dad

Anything on your mind that isn't about RLS? It's nice to realize that there is life beyond this disease and have an opportunity to get to know our online family in a different context.
badnights
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My Dad

Post by badnights »

I noticed my posts tonight are ending in bitter little hahahahas.

Explain, Beth.

Well, yesteday my Mom brought my Dad in to see his family doc (why not Emerg at the hosp) because he'd been dizzy for a few days. He didn't want to go, but she noticed he was drooling. The doctor said my Dad had had some transient ischemic attacks (mini-strokes) and prescribed blood pressure pills and didn't admit him to hospital!

That afternoon his face started to sag on one side, and his speech slurred a bit, but these things were happening so gradually my poor mother couldn't understand their significance. They went to bed. In the morning he fell because his right leg didn't do what it was supposed to. His speech was more slurred. He said he was fine. Then the doctor's office called about something completely unrelated - some test results for my mother, who has polymyalgia rheumatica - and when they heard what was happening to Dad, they told her to get him to the hospital immediately.

It wasn't quite immediate - that was about 10AM - because PEI had a dump of snow last night and their driveway was blocked. She called a neighbour who was not home, but his 19-yr-old son, when apprised of the situation, came over right away and plowed it. It was 4:30 PM before they got to the hospital.

He's still there. I'll know more tomorrow.

My Masters defense is on Wednesday. I have to spend Mon and Tues travelling to get there (Ontario).

Before then, I have to finish my defense presentation, a 45-minute talk which is followed by 15 min open Q&A, then 1-2 or more hours of grilling by my defense committee behind closed doors. I think I have studied well enough, I have accepted that my brain doesn't work as used to, but the presentation is still way too long and I have to chop it down to size tomorrow, so I can practice it on Sat, because there are unrelated things I need to do on Sunday.

I had already booked flights to see my parents after my defense, arriving Thursday evening (oh dear - to Charlottetown, and they live a 2-3 hr drive away from there - I will have to find a drive because my Mom shouldn't drive (the pain in her shoulders - I don't know how she got him to the hospital) and my Dad won't be able to.)
anyway
I wish I was already there, I think they need me now.
Beth - Wishing you a restful sleep tonight
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I am a volunteer moderator. My posts are not medical advice. My posts do not reflect RLS Foundation opinion.

Polar Bear
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Re: My Dad

Post by Polar Bear »

Oh wow... Beth. Sometimes everything seems to happen at once and it so happens that at present yours are all of big importance. I guess its one step at a time then tick it off the list.
Good luck with your Masters, that long journey, and the trip to your folks.
I send positive thoughts that everything runs to plan.
Betty
https://www.mayoclinicproceedings.org/a ... 0/fulltext
Opinions presented by Discussion Board Moderators are personal in nature and do not, in any way, represent the opinion of the RLS Foundation

rthom
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Re: My Dad

Post by rthom »

We'll be thinking about you here. I'm sure you'll do well and be exhausted, but with any luck be able to relax after the presentation.
I hope all works out well for you and your family. let us know how it's going.
Last edited by rthom on Fri Mar 16, 2012 11:59 pm, edited 1 time in total.

ViewsAskew
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Re: My Dad

Post by ViewsAskew »

Oh, Beth.

I have a lump in my throat just reading it...I can't imagine how you're doing living it. I know you have an incredible amount of 'fight" in you; if anyone can get through it, you can. My thoughts are with you.
Ann - Take what you need, leave the rest

Managing Your RLS

Opinions presented by Discussion Board Moderators are personal in nature and do not, in any way, represent the opinion of the RLS Foundation, and are not medical advice.

Polar Bear
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Re: My Dad

Post by Polar Bear »

Beth, how's things ??
Betty
https://www.mayoclinicproceedings.org/a ... 0/fulltext
Opinions presented by Discussion Board Moderators are personal in nature and do not, in any way, represent the opinion of the RLS Foundation

badnights
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Re: My Dad

Post by badnights »

I 'm so glad you're all here.

I knocked my presentation down to size. I still have to practice more to smooth it out. I called my Dad and luckily my mother was in the hospital room to answer the phone, because he has gotten worse (while in the hospital!?) and probably couldn't have picked it up. I talked to him but I couldn't understand a word he was trying to say and I think he started crying with frustration.

I have to keep doing things to stop myself from thinking. Every now and then it comes through and I scream and cry til it's done with me for a while. I really have to work hard at not thinking about it; even though I'm talking about it now I'm not really thinking too much.

It just seems so wrong to wait. I should be there now. I arrive there late on Thursday. Five whole days from now. Mom says nothing happens in that hospital over the weekend, and she thinks he will still be in the hospital when I get there.
Beth - Wishing you a restful sleep tonight
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I am a volunteer moderator. My posts are not medical advice. My posts do not reflect RLS Foundation opinion.

rthom
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Re: My Dad

Post by rthom »

Wow, so sorry to hear that beth. You must be going through the whole series of emotions right now, fear, anger.....
Sounds like your mom's got it about right and maybe that will help in some way--him being in hospital--we can all hope.
Anything we can do--Randy

ViewsAskew
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Re: My Dad

Post by ViewsAskew »

Events in life are so random - just seems so bloody unfair to happen together like this and to force choices no one should ever have to make. Whatever happens, you're doing the best you can in an untenable situation - no recriminations allowed.
Ann - Take what you need, leave the rest

Managing Your RLS

Opinions presented by Discussion Board Moderators are personal in nature and do not, in any way, represent the opinion of the RLS Foundation, and are not medical advice.

Polar Bear
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Re: My Dad

Post by Polar Bear »

Everyone has hindsight and no-one can tell the future.
I always reckon if we do the best we can at a given time, then that's the best we can do.
The next few days will see your Master's set to rest and then it can be compartmentalised and you
can concentrate on your dad and your mum.
It is not not not not not not being selfish to concentrate on your Master's for the next few days. It is the only window you
have to have it presented.
And without doubt I'm sure your dad would be behind you totally.

How awful to hear him breakdown in frustration, heart tearing. But as you say, that emotion will sit in a special little corner for a few days and until the task in hand is completed, and you can be with them.

Regards.
Betty
https://www.mayoclinicproceedings.org/a ... 0/fulltext
Opinions presented by Discussion Board Moderators are personal in nature and do not, in any way, represent the opinion of the RLS Foundation

ViewsAskew
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Re: My Dad

Post by ViewsAskew »

Am thinking about you. Hope the defense went well and imagine you're focused on your family now.
Ann - Take what you need, leave the rest

Managing Your RLS

Opinions presented by Discussion Board Moderators are personal in nature and do not, in any way, represent the opinion of the RLS Foundation, and are not medical advice.

badnights
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Re: My Dad

Post by badnights »

I am exhausted. The defense went well, I passed. I have a few edits I have to complete by Apr 19. Haven't had a moment to work on them- I'm too stupid by evening, and we drive in to the hospital every day. Next week we're going to start taking turns on alternate days, because we're both getting worn out.

The good news is that my Dad is getting better really fast, he can talk well, he has no comprehension problems, though he can be slow to think of the word he wants sometimes; he reads slowly but that's better than last week when he could hardly read at all. As for movement, his right arm is moving now though his hand still doesn't work well, and he can walk a bit but only when a therapist or nurse is present. He has been moved to the rehab unit.

the whole stroke unit here was only built a few years ago. Good timing!
Beth - Wishing you a restful sleep tonight
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I am a volunteer moderator. My posts are not medical advice. My posts do not reflect RLS Foundation opinion.

roxaneraquel
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Re: My Dad

Post by roxaneraquel »

Sounds optimistic.... Sounds like he will do well with rehab.... Keep up the hope.... Congrats on passing....

Polar Bear
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Re: My Dad

Post by Polar Bear »

Congratulations Beth, well done.

And great news that your dad is improving.
Take care.
Betty
https://www.mayoclinicproceedings.org/a ... 0/fulltext
Opinions presented by Discussion Board Moderators are personal in nature and do not, in any way, represent the opinion of the RLS Foundation

ViewsAskew
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Re: My Dad

Post by ViewsAskew »

Happy to hear all of the above. Thanks for letting us know.
Ann - Take what you need, leave the rest

Managing Your RLS

Opinions presented by Discussion Board Moderators are personal in nature and do not, in any way, represent the opinion of the RLS Foundation, and are not medical advice.

rthom
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Re: My Dad

Post by rthom »

Good news. Remember through all of this to take care of yourself. Talk to you later.

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