Does anyone's spouse also have a chronic condition?

Share how living with this disease can and does impact your relationships. How do you cope? What questions to you have?
ViewsAskew
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Postby ViewsAskew » Tue Jul 08, 2008 4:02 am

I'll second that...each day, one at a time, enjoying them as much as you can. Life doesn't get much better than that. Now, if I could only remember that when I get hurried, upset, worried, etc...... :?
Ann - Take what you need, leave the rest

Managing Your RLS

Opinions presented by Discussion Board Moderators are personal in nature and do not, in any way, represent the opinion of the RLS Foundation, and are not medical advice.

nephriticus
Posts: 86
Joined: Sun Aug 22, 2004 5:02 am
Location: Sequim, WA

Postby nephriticus » Tue Jul 08, 2008 5:11 am

Thought I'd pop in here. Haven't been here in a long time. I guess I am a recovering RLS'r. (Hi Ann, Ruth, Lynn, Jim, ...who'd I forget?)
I found it interesting that I immediately happened upon RLS and Relationships. I experienced RLS for about five or six years. It started quite abruptly about halfway into a decade of caregiving for my wife. My dear wife passed away two years ago. She ardently prayed to be freed of her misery. What is noteworthy, RLS-wise, is that my RLS symptoms disappeared completely about a month following my wife's death. My assessment of that fact is that my RLS was induced by stress. Which makes me wonder how many of you caregivers suffer RLS because of, or aggravated by, stress.

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Neph
Currently RLS free. Symptoms stopped almost abruptly after my long term, full time care giving duties ended with passing of wife. No stress, no RLS.
***************************************

ViewsAskew
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Joined: Thu Oct 28, 2004 6:37 am
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Postby ViewsAskew » Tue Jul 08, 2008 7:33 pm

Hi Neph,

I was so happy to see your name. How are you? Your life has changed a lot, I imagine.

Very interesting about your RLS and your caretaking. Thank you for sharing that.
Ann - Take what you need, leave the rest



Managing Your RLS



Opinions presented by Discussion Board Moderators are personal in nature and do not, in any way, represent the opinion of the RLS Foundation, and are not medical advice.

nephriticus
Posts: 86
Joined: Sun Aug 22, 2004 5:02 am
Location: Sequim, WA

Postby nephriticus » Wed Jul 09, 2008 1:23 am

Hi Ann,

Yes there have been a number of changes. I anticipated becoming a full time caregiver for my only-child son in the next few years. He was beginning the downward debilitation of muscular dystrophy that his mother experienced. I expected that RLS symptoms would reappear at that time. However, an illness partially related to his MD caused him to join his mother late last year. He was 34. The silver lining to the cloud is that he was spared the final years of continued physical deterioration and total dependence.

I met a lovely woman about fifteen months ago who shares many interests with me and we very recently became engaged. My son's departure notwithstanding, I have experienced many rewards in the past year. I am retired, financially secure, in good health and very active. For that, plus sleeping quite well at night, I count my blessings several times each day. I only wish that I could share some of my good fortune with the rest of you.

Dale
Neph

Currently RLS free. Symptoms stopped almost abruptly after my long term, full time care giving duties ended with passing of wife. No stress, no RLS.

***************************************

mikeyvon
Posts: 99
Joined: Thu Aug 26, 2004 3:23 am
Location: Northumberland, PA

Postby mikeyvon » Wed Jul 09, 2008 2:31 am

Hi Neph,

This is Mike...from the RLS meeting in Long Beach in 2004. Wow, you've been through some bad stuff. But glad things are much better now. My wife's brother died of MD at age 21 just before we were married. Man, is that disease is ugly. Maybe i'll catch ya on one of my many visits to California sometime. Keep having fun.

mike

ViewsAskew
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Joined: Thu Oct 28, 2004 6:37 am
Location: Chicago

Postby ViewsAskew » Wed Jul 09, 2008 4:37 am

Neph, you must have one great philosophy to be dealing with all of this so well. You sound happy...and that is well-deserved. I wish you and your bride-to-be all the happiness. She's a lucky lady.
Ann - Take what you need, leave the rest



Managing Your RLS



Opinions presented by Discussion Board Moderators are personal in nature and do not, in any way, represent the opinion of the RLS Foundation, and are not medical advice.

becat
Posts: 2842
Joined: Thu Apr 29, 2004 11:41 pm

Postby becat » Thu Jul 10, 2008 8:13 pm

Neph my Man! I cried at the site of your name. I miss you so much, my friend.

Your loved, missed, and still needed around here, no matter if you have RLS or not. Please never forget that my brother. :!:

I know things changed so much for you after your wife's passing, God bless you and Her. I did see a bit of a spark of life coming back last we emailed, it was a blessing. Your a man with an amazing heart and just a wit from the funniest place ever. I will always love you. :wink:

Yes, I would have to agree that stress is a major component to our RLS.
After the hubby had open heart I started walking with him. Thankfully, he had to start slow, I'm not sure I could have done it any faster, but it helps so much. Finding the right level was hard for me, but I did it. Thought about your pushups before bed every night and just kept plugging. :D

One thing I found that helped me through the teenage years (my boys) and with the hubby traveling so much (gets worse every year, I swear) was to keep connected with all of them on some even ground.

For my boys I would have date night, the hubby it was cards or notes stuffed into his luggage, to find later. It helped that we all had some even ground to stand on through the tough times.

A very good man and beloved friend keeps reminding me to "to take it easy on myself) and in practicing that I have found much relief.

Life just happens all at once some days. Do the best you can and then make sure you before you go to bed to give yourself a break. Whatever that might be.

Gosh, Neph.............just good to see your name.

Love , hugs, and a moon full of prayers for us all.
Lynne


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