Posted: Wed Jul 07, 2010 8:26 pm
In the last few months, my pendulum has swung the other way. For a long time I was functioning so poorly that it didn't take asking to find out if I'd slept or not. From memory loss to black circles to snappy/mean conversation, everyone knew, whether we talked or not.
But, we did talk. It seems that everyone in my life suddenly not only understood my problem, but wanted to talk about it each time I saw them. It began to feel that my sleep - or lack of it - was what 98% of my conversations were about. After some time, I started to feel as if I was defined by the conversations and that I was, at the least, creating my own crappy mood because all I did was whine, complain, or snarl.
I've asked everyone not to talk about it. If I need to, I know who to go to. Funny, everything seems better now. Part of that is because I finally have a med combo, so I'm not discouting how important that is. But, part of it is that I'm no longer a captive to it. Could I have broken out without the meds working? I'm not sure. I'm just glad they did.
Eventually, I'm sure the pendulum will swing back. And, eventually, I'll be complaining that no one listens to me, lol.
But, we did talk. It seems that everyone in my life suddenly not only understood my problem, but wanted to talk about it each time I saw them. It began to feel that my sleep - or lack of it - was what 98% of my conversations were about. After some time, I started to feel as if I was defined by the conversations and that I was, at the least, creating my own crappy mood because all I did was whine, complain, or snarl.
I've asked everyone not to talk about it. If I need to, I know who to go to. Funny, everything seems better now. Part of that is because I finally have a med combo, so I'm not discouting how important that is. But, part of it is that I'm no longer a captive to it. Could I have broken out without the meds working? I'm not sure. I'm just glad they did.
Eventually, I'm sure the pendulum will swing back. And, eventually, I'll be complaining that no one listens to me, lol.