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Re: Very Tired

Posted: Mon May 06, 2019 8:09 pm
by debbluebird
I'm thinking, that maybe I have become tolerant of the gabapentin. I realized that lately my spasms are stronger. I won't be seeing my Doctor for two weeks. I don't want to increase the dose. That would get me nowhere. I would like to go back up on the Methadone and stop the Gabapentin. I don't know if it will be possible. I also don't know if the Doctor will be willing to increase the Methadone high enough so that I can wean off the Gabapentin.

Re: Very Tired

Posted: Tue May 07, 2019 10:19 am
by debbluebird
I got some sleep last night, even though I could use a few more hours. My thigh has a slight burning all over the front side. I feel this confirms my feelings of the gabapentin no longer working.
I traveled yesterday, so I knew that last night would be difficult. I don't have my Kratom or hemp oil with me. I don't like to carry that stuff on an airplane.
I hate the thought of having to go through another withdrawal.

Re: Very Tired

Posted: Tue May 07, 2019 3:22 pm
by Vanwing
I imagine stopping cold turkey is hell, right?

Re: Very Tired

Posted: Tue May 07, 2019 11:05 pm
by debbluebird
Yes it would be hell. I would never do that. I might not even be able to wean off, unless I replace it with something.

Re: Very Tired

Posted: Mon May 13, 2019 3:10 am
by debbluebird
I posted last night, but I must not have pressed submit hard enough, or it's somewhere else.
I was up with really bad spasms. Not able to even sit. Had to take an extra oxy after an hour. I've never done that before. I just really wanted some sleep. Will see how tonight goes.

Re: Very Tired

Posted: Mon May 13, 2019 8:33 pm
by ViewsAskew
I hate that feeling that I really want to sleep. It always scares me that in my impaired state I will do something foolish.

Re: Very Tired

Posted: Tue May 14, 2019 2:35 am
by debbluebird
So I did 2 oxycodone two nights in a row plus my regular stuff. I can't continue that. So that means I will be up a lot for awhile. I traveled today, left my Daughter's house, so it doesn't matter when I sleep now. It feels like the oxy isn't working anymore either. All the meds are telling my body to take more.
Weird, only awhile back I felt so much better. Not anymore.
I only got a couple of hours last night even though I took extra meds.
My husband tells me he found a tablet with the meds I was taking about 10 years ago. Five or more every night. It was a bad period. Now isn't much better.

Re: Very Tired

Posted: Tue May 14, 2019 1:47 pm
by Polar Bear
deb, you sound so sad. I hope you manage to get back to a better time.

Re: Very Tired

Posted: Tue May 14, 2019 7:58 pm
by ViewsAskew
To me, this is one of the worst parts of any chronic condition...that every time it is better for awhile, the next down period almost seems worse, if possible. Learning to ride with the ups and downs is so hard. Especially when every time it is better you are so sure it is going to be for a long time.

Re: Very Tired

Posted: Wed May 15, 2019 2:56 pm
by debbluebird
ViewsAskew wrote:To me, this is one of the worst parts of any chronic condition...that every time it is better for awhile, the next down period almost seems worse, if possible. Learning to ride with the ups and downs is so hard. Especially when every time it is better you are so sure it is going to be for a long time.
Exactly !! After leaving my Daughter's house on Monday, my husband picked me up from the airport. We didn't go home. We just drove on into Wyoming. A little vacation. He thought I would enjoy it. Usually I would. It's hard though because I'm so miserable. I changed my mind. I'm going to take extra oxy to get through this week, then when we go home I'll stop them.
I had been able to walk, now I can't go very far. Back hurts when I do. I think weight gain has caused it. Sleep is messed up, legs are messed up.
Yes Betty, I'm not my usual self. Each time it gets worse.
With my son in laws death and then our dog ( I know it's not the same as a person), I am sad. My Daughter is having such a hard time functioning. This breaks my heart. This is the worst part.
I will get through this like I always do.
When my sleep is messed up I don't function well. Drugs mess me up too I hate them more than anything.

Re: Very Tired

Posted: Wed May 15, 2019 7:50 pm
by ViewsAskew
debbluebird wrote:
ViewsAskew wrote:To me, this is one of the worst parts of any chronic condition...that every time it is better for awhile, the next down period almost seems worse, if possible. Learning to ride with the ups and downs is so hard. Especially when every time it is better you are so sure it is going to be for a long time.
Exactly !! After leaving my Daughter's house on Monday, my husband picked me up from the airport. We didn't go home. We just drove on into Wyoming. A little vacation. He thought I would enjoy it. Usually I would. It's hard though because I'm so miserable. I changed my mind. I'm going to take extra oxy to get through this week, then when we go home I'll stop them.
I had been able to walk, now I can't go very far. Back hurts when I do. I think weight gain has caused it. Sleep is messed up, legs are messed up.
Yes Betty, I'm not my usual self. Each time it gets worse.
With my son in laws death and then our dog ( I know it's not the same as a person), I am sad. My Daughter is having such a hard time functioning. This breaks my heart. This is the worst part.
I will get through this like I always do.
When my sleep is messed up I don't function well. Drugs mess me up too I hate them more than anything.
If this continues, maybe consider that you are depressed, Deb. It would be no wonder if you were.

Re: Very Tired

Posted: Wed May 15, 2019 11:50 pm
by debbluebird
Probably. I've taken antidepressants before. Last one put weight on me.

Re: Very Tired

Posted: Thu May 16, 2019 12:46 pm
by Polar Bear
Deb - don't forget that as well as the loss of your son-in-law and the death of your dog, you also have the awfulness of watching your daughter suffer. You are living at a distance away from her and are likely feeling the frustration of helplessness.

As Ann says, it would be no wonder if you are depressed.
All of this on top of everything else. Perhaps you need to consider a GP conversation.

Re: Very Tired

Posted: Thu May 16, 2019 10:36 pm
by debbluebird
Yes, I'm seeing my Doctor Tuesday. Yes, watching my Daughter is heart breaking.

Re: Very Tired

Posted: Fri May 17, 2019 3:59 am
by ViewsAskew
Deb - do consider there are lots of ADs. You know that, you were a nurse. Just a reminder that a different one might not cause weight gain. I gained SO fast on one of them, but this last one? I didn't gain at all. Of course, it is one of the newer ones and it cost and arm and a leg. Sometimes seems we cannot win.