Restless Legs Syndrome (RLS) Discussion Board

--- In cfssupport4sufferers@y..., "Daniel Smith" <nanou@i...> wrote:
On second thoughts (and based on a very recent experience... like 2 minutes ago recent) I'd like to submit my first official book entry:

GETTING A MIDNIGHT SNACK FOR DUMMIES

In three easy steps, with three easy principles.

1. If you are worried about waking other people in your household
by turning on the light: bugger them. The sound of clattering
cuttlery and dirty dishes (as you blindly grope for what you are
looking for) is much more likely to wake them as it travels through
walls, unlike a little light. This is known as the "Light-Noise
Compromise Principle".

2. If you know what you want, and can see what you want (a packet
of chicken chips for example) but it is hidden behind a carton of
Frosties, instant porridge, cookins, rice and about 20 different
Maggi sachets, then DO NOT fart around trying to carefully move each
object out of the way, pausing briefly when each makes the tiniest
sound. Reach your hand in to the cupboard, grasp the object firmly
and remove it. A short sharp noise is much better than a prolonged
rumbling of packets. This is known as the "Preferable Aural
Experience Principle." The "Preferable Aural Experience Principle"
works for getting a glass of water too. Rather than run the tap at a
piddly trickle for 5 minutes, filling up the glass a nanometer per
second, turn it on quickly, so the glass is poured full of water in
2 seconds. Then stop the tap before flooding the kitchen.

3. Ensure you have everything you wish to take back to bed IN YOUR
HANDS as you turn out the light. Do not, for example, keep hold of
the packet of Chicken Chips, but neglect to pick up the glass of
water before turning off the light, then stumble blindly to find it
making a crash-bang noise every few seconds, finnally give in and
turn on the light, see the glass, swear loudly, then turn the light
off again. This is called the "Final Accountability Principle."

----- Original Message -----
From: Daniel Smith
To: cfssupport4sufferers@y...
Sent: Monday, June 07, 2004 2:07 AM
Subject: Re: [CFS Support 4 Sufferers] GAME: BOOK TITLES

At the moment I'm thinking:
Insomnia for Dummies.
or
Insomnia for the Penilecaphylic (sp??)

but I'll come up with something a little more wittier and clever
tomorrow lol

I guess we're all entitled to our own beliefs, aren't we? And, we'll all find out who's right or wrong some day. (We sure will, and I will probably do that sooner than anybody in this discussion group). I'll try to keep my "beliefs" out of the posts from now on. (Please, don't). - comments in parentheses are mine, J.O.