sleep thief, LIFE THIEF!!!!

[lyndarae]

After reading the post by Sandygirl I feel like such a cry baby, I don't mean to sound like I'm that bad. I mean compared to 4 months ago Im dancing a jig. I just get so sick of this crap,ya know!!! But I know there are alot of you who are in alot more pain than me and it makes me feel helpless,Knowing I'm not alone any more is awesome but it just upsets me to think about so many people having to go through life like this. I just love you all and just wish we didnt have to go through all this pain and frustration. It sure blows me away how GOD brings people together in life.Sometimes I think if I didnt suffer from RLS I would have never met you all. Maybe thats why I do have it so I could meet this great group of people, it kinda makes it worth it all (KINDA) hahahahah I still gotta laugh or I'll cry love to you all and GOD BLESS Lyndarae

[jan3213]

Lyn, it's Jan

If there is one thing you are not, it is a crybaby!!! You are a brave, compassionate, wonderful person who has gone through so much in your lifetime! You have had things happen to you that most people couldn't handle, yet you pulled yourself up, in the middle of terrible heartache, and, without spending time in self-pity, you made a new life for yourself. I have never known anyone so brave and so willing to give of themselves as you, Lyn. Personally, you have helped me so much with personal problems, giving me some of the best advice I have ever had, and just being there to listen to me. I know how sick and tired you must get from RLS. I've been there, so I understand. That's what struck me so about the post from Sandy. Even in the midst of her daily dialysis and the emotional roller coaster of waiting for a new kidney, the one thing that really got to her the most was RLS. I feel horrible for her and what's she's going through. I wish I could help her. But when she said what she did about RLS and the effect it had on her, it just validated everything all of us go through. RLS is a real syndrome that can drive you crazy!! And, Lyn, when you go without sleep or don't get the right amount of sleep, it takes its toll on your body and your spirit. So, please don't ever think you are a crybaby. Sandy's situation is horrible, but that doesn't make yours any less bad. And, I'm sorry all of us has to go through this pain and frustration, too. As I've said before, I wouldn't wish RLS on my worst enemy!! But, there's a bright side to all of this. If I didn't have RLS, I wouldn't have sought out this forum and I wouldn't have met you, Lyn, and my other friends--Besides learning so much more about RLS itself, I think this forum has changed me for the better. It has made me more thoughtful, braver, more willing to fight for something I believe in. I just wanted you to know how valuable YOU are, Lyn, and how much people on this forum love YOU. You know I don't think we met by accident--I think God brought us together and I thank Him so much for letting me have the privilege of knowing you and being able to call you my friend. God Bless You! Jan

[jan3213]

Lyn,

I can't believe I missed the sentence in the post where you said you are going to have a grandbaby!!!! Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh HOW WONDERFUL!!! I'm so sorry I'm just now seeing it. I must have been half asleep or something! I was just re-reading about the fire and I didn't even see where you got snow. I must have been totally OUT OF IT!!! I'm so sorry--and SO EXCITED FOR YOU--and I must admit it, a little bit jealous!! Ha! I'll have to live the grandma part through you, if that's okay. You'll have to keep me posted 'cause who knows WHEN I'll be a granny! What wonderful news!!! ----- Snow, already--at least it seems early for us in southern Illinois! I bet it's beautiful up there when it snows (even when it doesn't)!!! You'll think this is funny, or pitiful - Ha! I told Becat the other night that I fell asleep at my computer (my meds make me do that) and actually fell out of my chair and broke part of our computer tray (the part that holds the mouse)! I not only did it once--oh no--I DID IT TWO TIMES!! But, neither my husband or our little protector, Willie the Wonder Dog, woke up. And, you gotta know I made some noise. Sorry I missed the baby post. If you knew how much I LOVE BABIES you wouldn't believe it!!

Love you,

Jan

P.S. Once again, all of you on this forum can laugh at the pitiful antics of Jan3213! Hey, I laugh at myself! Ha!

[lyndarae]

Hey all, Well its happening!!!!! I did have a few good months but its back to the hell hole. Since uping my mirapex last thursday I'm having all sorts of weird things going on. Depression,anxitey,anger,fear. Feeling like I could just fall asleep anywhere. Throwing up a couple times,wicked heartburn at night.Headaches blahblahblah!!!!! I have been threw so much in the last month(started new job,finding out Im going to be a grandma,missing my youngest daughters wedding,wacthing a client be held down by 4 men and injected with enough haladon to kill me or you,my girlfriends fire ect ect ect....... I have also had 4 injections in the last month TB,hepatitus(spell)+2 flu shot. The worst came last night.I went to bed and had the most frightning images and dreams. It scared me to death. Being single I was alone and I tell you what I wanted my mommy big time. At one point I could swear someone was sitting on my bed I could feel the movement, I was frozen I couldnt move turn a light on or anything.Things were falling on me and I was dogeing them in my sleep. I'm not one to have nightmares or anything close to last night so..... I have to think its the mirapex????? Im so glad you all are here to listen to me and say such nice things to me cause Im really having a hard time doing this alone in an empty apartment with noone to give me a hug everyone needs to have someone to hug them, Im just feeling so lonely. All my friends have families and husbands and they dont get RLS. So Im just trying to stay strong and do this. I did buy a back scather yesterday so I can reach my itches. I know my sister is sick of hereing about it,so that leaves my turtle(have you ever tried to hug a turtle) LOL Oh but he did win second place in the dress up your pet contest at are local pet store. STOP LAUGHING!!!!!! Lonely people have to really use their imaginations to entertain themselfs. I'll keep on trucking cause thats what I do but at this point I sure whould love to here my loved one tell me to lay still or anything else for that matter. You don't know what you've got till it's gone. this whole post is so depressing sorry guys but you really are my family and I need you and thank you all from the bottom of my heart for listening to me go on and on~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Lyndarae






t

[ViewsAskew]

Sometimes it just doesn't seem fair, does it? On the other hand, the body and mind are truly amazing at what they can take and keep on going even when we don't think we can take much more . . . I hope it gets better quickly.

In terms of the Mirapex, I just finished reading the Mirapex thread (I'm slowly going through all posts). I remember seeing that hallucinations and nausea are two of the symptoms of Mirapex. I myself could not tolerate over a certain amount of it before I had to come off. It wasn't as bad as yours, but bad enough that I didn't want to take it anymore. And, as I slowly decreased it, all the icky stuff went away. I was worried I'd be stuck with it forever! If you can tolerate it, try reducing it to where you were last comfortable. See what happens. The Mirapex thread had some good advice and several people seemed to have good luck taking the Mirapex with something else. That might make it be more tolerable.

Ann

[lyndarae]

THANK YOU ANN Im going to do some reading right now!!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~lyndarae

[jan3213]

Lyn, it's Jan

First of all, email me your phone #. I've lost it. I can't call tonight or tomorrow, but YOU'LL HEAR FROM ME SOON.

I'm so sorry you're having such a rough time. Luckily I haven't had any side effects from Mirapex, but I guess lots of people do. Years ago, I used to have "paralyzing" dreams. The kind where you were half awake but you couldn't move. They are terrifying. I don't blame you for being scared to death. Lyn, I'll never get sick of hearing anything from you!! Like I said last night, I wish I could just walk over and have a cup of coffee with you, but I can't I don't know why we have to go through hard times, except that it makes you stronger and, Lyn, look how far you've come and how strong you are!!! No matter how many miles separate us, I'm here for you. You can always count on me. I know that may not seem like much comfort, since you live alone and you feel alone, but, Lyn, you aren't alone--not really. Just hang on, don't let go--and remember I CARE LYN!!!

Love,

Jan

[lyndarae]

hEY THANKS GUYS, I had a good nights sleep I played on my computer till 4am. As an alcoholic they say its a good think to replace alcohol with something else well I'm now addicted to my computer. It's great being a newbie to computers this is my first one and I'm having a ball learning something new everyday. I got a bit scared yesterday and it just all hit me at once. The only thing I could think to do is type to you all. So once again thank you for putting up with me. Don't know where I'd be with out y'all. Hope I never have to find out. I just talked to my best friend of 40 years she thinks she might be comming to Pocatello next weekend she lives in Portland. That means I'll have someone to hug all weekend. GOD allways takes care of me. If I just let him!!~~~~~~~~~~~~Lyndarae

[becat]

((((LYN))))))),
Cyber hugs aren't a great replacement, bug that one is for you. I do not recommend hugging the puter, it's cold and hard. Turtles, well don't hug him too hard either. LOL
I have a question. Why are you out of Mirapex? Didn't the doctor give you refills?
As you might have figured out I'm addicted to my puter too. I can find tons of things to read, research, and play when I'm up while my house is sleeping. And with the cold (ha in texas, right, I know) coming I know I'll be here more. The heating pad, just got a new one wooo whoooooo, a cup of ice, and I'm good. I do tons of writing late at night, best work after 1 am.
I'm so sorry your having a tough time again. It's a battle with our bodies, some days more than others. But when the mind starts fighting it tends to wear thin quick. Your a strong gal, Lyn. We all know it. Just think about how far you've come in a few months.............Your heart still seeks joy, love, and laughter........that's priceless. Never forget that you are that you are cared for, thought of, prayed for, ENJOYED. Your not being silly about all of this. Your trying to work through it and doing a fine job. There was a time you wouldn't have bothered to try, to fight, to breath in and out until forced........You have your wings and your using them beautifully. Struggle is apart of our lives, it's how we deal with it all that counts. Your dealing, not running. Hang another star for yourself, you seserve it.
I love ya, miss our chats in the chat room. We so need to get back in there......laughter is great medicine.
Love and hugs to ya,

[lyndarae]

HEY BECAT WOW A NEW HEATING PAD HOW COOL. I CANT BELIEVE IM GETTING EXCITED OVER A HEATING PAD MY OH MY OH MY IT DOESNT TAKE MUCH TO MAKE ME HAPPY. YA THE CHAT ROOM SOUNDS GOOD IM IN FOR THE NIGHT MAYBE WE SHOULD TRY TO HOOK UP....... ALTHO IM STILL LOOKING FOR A BOY YA KNOW I NEED NEW TIRES PUT ON MY CAR....LOL ECT..ECT..ECT... IM NOT OUT OF MIRAPEX THE DOC UPED IT,ITS TAKING TIME TO GET USE TO IT. BUT I THINK THINGS ARE SETTLING DOWN. I DIDNT REALIZE HOW UPSETING THAT WHOLE FIRE THING WAS ON ME. I TEND TO GET TOO INVOLVED WHEN IT COMES TO HELPING MY FRIENDS AND IT CAUSED ME ALOT OF STRESS. AND I KNOW THIS WILL SOUND STRANGE BUT THAT APARTMENT HAD BAD BAD ENEGRY ITS HARD TO TALK ABOUT THINGS LIKE THAT BUT I HAVE BEEN BLESS WITH PHYSIC ABLITIES AND I NEVER LIKED GOING TO HER HOUSE AND ONLY WENT ONCE BEFORE THE FIRE. SHE KNEW ABOUT IT TOO BUT HER HUSBAND PICKED THE PLACE BEFORE SHE EVEN SAW IT.WHEN WE TOOK PICTURES OF THE FIRE YOU WOULD NOT BELIEVE WHAT WE CAPTURED...AND I DID NOT SMUDGE AFTER LEAVING THERE AND I THINK I PICKED UP A LITTLE BAD ENGERY AND BROUGHT IT HOME ANYWAY I SMUDGED THE HOUSE AND ITS ALL GOOD. iM PRETTY SURE YOU KNOW WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT. I HAVE NATIVE AMERICAN GRANDPARENTS AND I FOLLOW ALOT OF THEIR TEACHINGS. IT WAS JUST A TOUGH DAY. AND I MADE IT THREW STILL KICKING(NO PUN INTENDED) HAHAHA HOPE YOU ARE DOING WELL WITH YOUR HEAT AND ICE, IM A CRUNCHER TOO(((((((((((((((((hugs back at ya) Lyndarae

[lyndarae]

Well its been another good day for me I think the mirapex is starting to fit with my body.Things just seem to be going better the last coulpe of days. I know its important to go slow when uping the medication, maybe my body just couldnt handel it. Any way thanks again for letting me vent. I really dont know what I would do with out you all. I was talking to a gal that works in the house next to mine,and she says she startred having RLS after a car accident but that she does not take any medication what so ever for it.I guess I must be a wimp cause I dont think I could stand the pain day after day after day.I admire those people who can do it tho. Hope everyone has a good night. I got to see the northern lights tonight it was a beautiful site. And remined me just how small I really am in the world. And how amazing things are.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Lyndarae

[lyndarae]

Hey Guys my bad I have never feed the trolls before and I wanted to do it once in my life so I did. I tried not to be rude but people should not mess with my mates!!!! Hopefully we have heard the last from that one. Unless they opened their minds and really read whats here. The sad part about it for me was guest sounded like something my own daughter whould say. She feels the same way about RLS and wont even talk about it. Im just so grateful I found this forum and I dont have to think something is wrong with just me. Im probably one of the people guest was purging about, wha wha wha, If I hold it all in I would for sure be in the State Hospital about now so I just keep trying to share my good days along with the bad cause thats what friends are for~~~~~~~~~`Lyndarae

[jan3213]

Lyn, it's Jan

You did just fine, Lyn. Sometimes you have to stand up for things!! And, you can vent any time you want to. This is a safe place for that. We are all here for each other (or we should be) fighting together against the demon RLS! We all have good days and bad days and you have shared many of your good days with us!! It's such a joy to see how far you've come. You're not by yourself. I think this place has done so much for so many people, including myself. It's obviously a support site for RLS, but it's even more than that. It has made me a more caring person (not that I wasn't already caring), but I have been able to see outside my own world and have met some wonderful people (YOU INCLUDED). It's also made me more confident in my ability to communicate with people I don't know. I have been blessed because of this site. When I welcome newcomers and share with them whatever experience I have had with RLS that I think might help them, I forget my own problems. It helps me to help other people. You've helped me, Lyn. And, I want to thank you for sticking up for our "family". I don't think you were rude at all. I think your comments to Guest were very good--you defended this place, you explained what we are about, and you offered him the opportunity to join us. Thank you, Lyn, for stepping outside of your comfort zone to speak up for something so important--our main goal here, besides support for each other, is to someday be able to say there is a cure for RLS.

Your dear friend,

Jan

[lyndarae]

Hey all, I should know this but duh, I was just wondering what over the counter pain reliever is used the mos t and the best for you to take??? TYLENOL, MOTRIN,ADVIL,ASPRIN,ALEIVE??? Any advice?? Thanks for any suggestions. The ultram is not working and Im all readt taking 50mg QID!!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[lyndarae]

Hey all, Well to the ones who have followed my threads and know me I just wanted to let you all know whats up!!! You know how much heart I put into getting a job and all the training that went with it and I did that in a months time. The only part was they never told me that it is part of my job to get the crap beat out of me!!! I was told on tuesday that if the new client went after the other one I need to be in the middle to stop it and to protect her. Well I get that but heres the problem. SS is 5'10 and 178lbs, Im 5'4 and 150 lbs.No macth there. I have been under so much stress working there that my Rls is out of control. The other day SS came flying out of her room and bumped into me throwing me on my knees. I couldnt walk for 2 days. I am now going on to nightshifts as of next week. I finally started sleeping now I have to stay awake!!!! I sure wish I could get things in line if only for a short time.Im going to try graveyard but changing the zanax is going to be a *****. But this too shall pass RIGHT!! Thanks for listning as always~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Lyndarae