Mind won't relax/can't sleep

[Polar Bear]

I shall look out for Vit B12 today. Of course, we are all so different, but nothing to lose.

[badnights]

views:
I am convinced it's my meds also and not solely my disease that causes the hyper-alertness, because the sleeplessness even with WED sensations controlled began when I started taking opioids (codeine); and because I can almost set a clock by the change in me. 1.5 to 2 hours after taking the 10 PM dose, I become wide awake, no matter how desperately sleepy I was before that.

I always thought if I moved the medications earlier in order to sleep earlier, I would not have adequate coverage of the sensations. I wonder if it might be worth me trying that too. Currently I take (this is hydromorph contin):
3 mg 1:00 PM (this one is just to avoid withdrawal symptoms; I can tolerate the daytime symptoms otherwse)
6 mg 6:00 PM
6 mg 10:00 PM
I used to also take 3 mg at 11 PM most nights, but since my diet has improved my life, I have dropped that one.

[ViewsAskew]

I realized recently that I need to adjust when I take my meds based on when I awaken, since it's different for me each day. Today I went to be at 7:30 AM and was up at about 4 PM. I slept lousily for the first few hours, so was happy to sleep well during the afternoon. But, I'd not taken my meds at the right time. Because I'd been sleeping later the last few days, I didn't take the drugs at the right times. I need to program alarms, I think, with the first one just 3 hours after I awaken, and so on.

[badnights]

Darn. I don't want to go there. I want to try to keep my body from free-wheeling like that. I try to use the meds to force a more normal schedule onto it, as well as to control the symptoms.

Today I skipped the 1 PM dose and moved the other two up an hour. So far so good. I still feel WED in my ankles and wrists, but I have another 1.5 hr before peak effectiveness. I know I won't be able to sleep until 1 AM at least... but I am going to try taking the sleeping pill at midnite, which is an hour earlier than before.

I wonder (repeatedly and often) if I would be better off free-wheeling. I could ditch both the zopiclone for sleeping and the modafinil for staying alert, reducing my total drug load considerably. Maybe I would be sharp and smart too.

haaha.

[ViewsAskew]

In some ways, I'm so much better off letting my body tell me. But, in other ways, I'm not at all better off. If I knew which was best, I'd stick with it.

I've sort of been trying to impose slight order in the chaos, while still listening to my body. I think it's working better... Or I'm delusional.

I have recently been thinking that, for me, continuous opioid use is one of the biggest problems. I HAVE to have breaks. But, to get them, I have to deal with symptoms on my own - there is nothing that works. I've been wondering if a complete detox would be the best option, deal with being crazy with symptoms, then see if things work differently. For all I know, things that don't seem to work might work. Could be that they don't seem to work because I'm always in withdrawal from opioids when I try them.

[EeFall]

Personally I think a scheduled life is the way to go. Working it almost has to be that way for me. If I didn't work I think I would still have a schedule but because WED is least at 4am I would probably sleep from 4am until 11am (noon if I was lucky). When I don't sleep I pretend in the morning that I have slept and think that I will be able to get through the day and be able to sleep that night. I will take the same meds usually or up one maybe. If the next day I still haven't slept then I will get drastic with my meds and up them for the coming evening. It is a continual fight to keep the schedule of getting up at 5:25am and going to bed at night when I can, usually around 10:30pm.

The nights I have been staying up I have been trying to put a more positive face on it. I used to walk back and forth like a zombie but I got sick of it and started listening to rock on my iPhone with ear-buds so I don't disturb my wife. I have around 2,000 songs currently on my phone and I switch them out occasionally. I have around 6,000 songs on my laptop. If I am sick to death of RLS I listen to Metallica (I bought their entire collection on iTunes) and when I get sick of listening to heavy metal I go to different more mellow playlists. I have stood in the middle of our living room dancing to the music for as long as 4 or 5 hours without stopping. The doctors comment on my great blood pressure, heart rate, and health in general (which annoys the heck out of me because I know the WED truth of it) but pacing alone is good exercise, try dancing all night!

[Polar Bear]

Dancing through the night, now there's an idea, love it....must get the positive vibes to my hips/knees.