crushing depression

woodsie357 · Post by **woodsie357** » Thu May 28, 2009 12:53 pm

Hi guys, wish I had better things to post. My husband lost his job, expenses much higher then any money coming in. I feel awful. I wear wrist braces, and an elbow brace for pain relief. I have RLS and take methadone for it, also ambien without insurance its 50$, noway I'm going to be able to continue it at that price. I'm terrified of going back to 1 or 2 hours of sleep each night. I have 4 kids youngest 2 years old, and she is insanely active. I can't keep up. My husband can't watch her and take job calls. I've been in this situation a time or two before, I reacted by getting a job, or a 2nd job. This time I just don't feel like I can. I've had serious thoughts of suicide in the past, and quit my job at the time to reduce my stress level, and avoid suicide. I'm totally and completely devastated right now. I feel so hopeless, I can't stop crying. I'm totally and completely grateful that my husband isn't as depressed as I am. Almost 1 full month now. He's had 2 interviews, no offers yet. I'd ask if there was a magic pill for this, but I think I need a shot at this point lol. I want to be happy again, I don't want to feel the world coming down around me anymore. :cry:

woodsie357 · Post by **woodsie357** » Thu May 28, 2009 12:56 pm

oops a little more. He's a php web developer with mad skills. Every job he applies for wants him to take a test. One section of one of the tests asked him to make a Tic Tac Toe game http://216.120.228.235/~rhenders/ttt/
it's completely from off the top of his head, using nothing from the internet. I thought I'd share it.

Neco · Post by **Neco** » Thu May 28, 2009 1:05 pm

How come you are not sleeping with ambien? Is your pain not adequately controlled?

woodsie357 · Post by **woodsie357** » Thu May 28, 2009 5:57 pm

added stress maybe... and I think arthritis. any of you know about arthritis pain, I had run cold water over my hand and my knuckles felt like I was pouring salt on an open wound. I've had some breakthrough RLS, but retarded me didn't bring it up well enough with Dr. Earley. I was too busy balling my eyes out, I couldn't even talk.

OH one other thing keeping me up is that darn exploding head syndrome!!! awful, I hear voices... my kids yelling MOM in my ear, wake up and noone is in the room. Last night Id fall asleep for 2 mins then wake up thinking the alarm was going off, when it wasn't.

Generic Ambien is 50$ for 30 pills, I'm short on all our bills so I can't afford it anymore.

Betty/WV · Post by **Betty/WV** » Fri May 29, 2009 11:24 am

Hi Woodsie: I read your post, and feel so bad for all that you are going through. But I feel so helpless when I hear something like this. You just naturally want to do something to help. The best thing that we can do, when there is a situation like yours, is to pray for the person. I pray that things will get better, soon. That your husband will find a job and your pain will lessen. Wish you the best.

BETTY/WV

Betty/WV · Post by **Betty/WV** » Fri May 29, 2009 11:27 am

Woodsie: One more thing, I understand where you are coming from with the artheritis pain. I to have artheritis, especially in my knees. My qualitity of life is nothing. I hurt so bad all the time, plus the RLS.

BETTY/WV

Neco · Post by **Neco** » Fri May 29, 2009 12:17 pm

If you can handle it, you might want to ask your doctor about an increase in the Methadone to help deal with the Arthritis, I know there are people out there on pretty strong stuff for it. But even if its just another 5mg, it might help out a little..

Also, ask your doctor if the maker of Ambien offers any assistance programs where they will either help pay for your medication, or give it to you for free.. Your doctor should be able to get those forms for you.

Post by **ViewsAskew** » Fri May 29, 2009 6:00 pm

Woodsie, so sorry this is happening. I wish I knew someone looking for his skillset. If I do, I'll certainly let you know. I also wish I had some words of wisdom or advice that would help, alas, I do not.

woodsie357 · Post by **woodsie357** » Sun May 31, 2009 10:24 pm

Thank you guys! I wish I could just get over it! thats for sure! I appreciate your responses.

My prayer goes something like this "Dear God if we will survive this please take away my unnecessary worry and anxiety today."

I wish I had my own money to spend to stimulate the economy lol!! I guess keeping my house would be a good start now =)

Did anyone play the tic tac toe game that I linked?