I did everything the same tonight. I took a shower just before bedtime because I recently discovered that it seems to calm me down and to make the itching of the narcotic less. I felt good and went to bed and just lay there for 45 minutes and I finally realized I'm not going off to dreamland. It reminds me of the hyper-alertness of methadone, pretty much exactly the same. I have no RLS symptoms such as needing to move, jerking my appendages, the feeling of getting jolted by electricity. The meds are working great to suppress the WED totally.
The problem is that I can't sleep. I just don't have the sleep fairy dusting me with pixy dust I guess. Lyrica used to do that for me but I don't take it anymore. It was a night of 4mg of Suboxone with no pramipexole. When I got up I took .125mg of pramipexole but the problem there is that the doctors usually advise, with good reason, to take it 3 hours before bedtime. It takes that long to work, although I tried it the other night and it did seem to work after about 2 hours so I still have another hour to go
I mentioned to the doc of the possibility of taking an antidepressant to make me sleepy but he was against that idea and was only aware of one that might work. I wondered then why not give it to me because I only need one that will work
Doctors (I'm shaking my head), they fiddle with my life and tell me BS which is just that, yet they don't know exactly what causes WED, they don't know exactly how to treat it, and I am their total nightmare. The last 2 doctors were visibly relieved to get rid of me as I was probably bad for their egos.
I can see that. I suppose it would be like a mechanic that has this lemon of a car come in every week and he gets sick of trying to figure out what the hell is wrong with it. It doesn't seem to fit the nice comfortable parameters the mechanic is used to. Heck, I have even had some of these doctors more or less call me a liar! I hope there is an afterlife and I can roll back my life and show them all the freaking miserable nights I have had without sleep, without being even able to sit down. The freaking bruises on my feet from pacing week on end. The falling asleep on my feet and smashing into a wall or falling over a chair, or landing face first on the hardwood floor. Yeah, I would like to be able to show them.
If I were retired it wouldn't matter as much I suppose, but I'm not, and I have to work. I have to get up in 4 1/2 hours to go to work. I have a desk job, they pay me to think, I'm not much good at thinking without sleep. This thing just keeps going on and on like a roller coaster (as so many of us on this board have mentioned before). Can't I get 3 lousy nights sleep in a row anymore? I really thought it would happen tonight. There is more going on with my WED than I even understand. There has to be. Just think, without drugs I cannot lay down, I can't sleep. All of my sleep is fake, my body doesn't even know what it is anymore, it really doesn't.
I'm just typing away rambling on, working myself up. I get mad about this. There are people who actually have normal lives, it is hard to believe, but true. I am weak now. I can't take the lack of sleep like I once did, it is too hard on me. When I was 45 years old I could do it, but now 14 year later it is more difficult. I just nodded off and left a bunch of "d's" on here. That is good news, I off to bed now. Later.